Tag Archives for " life lessons "

Love Stinks

Monday, 2:33pm
San Diego, CA
“If you see my little red rooster, please send him home…” (Howling Wolf, master of innuendo)

Howdy…

I’m actually starting this blog in longhand, sitting in the Southwest terminal in San Diego…

… finally dragging my exhausted butt homeward after logging a full week here putting on the now-fabled Action Seminar.

It was a spectacular success, if you’re keeping score.

We directly challenged every seminar model out there… and delivered two frighteningly-on-target days of specific advice, techniques and life-transforming revelations.

Both the roomful of attendees, and the small army of Big Dog experts we assembled, loved the experience.  If you’re following the social media threads of folks like James “Schrak” Schramko, Mary Ellen Tribby, Big Jason Henderson, the Halbert boys, Harlan Kilstein, Brian Johnson, Kevin Rogers, Lorrie Morgan-Ferrero, and the other stellar names who participated…

… then you’re already hip to how the event went.

Excellent buzz.

Shame on you for missing it.

Anyway…

I haven’t got a lot of time here, so I need to focus on what I wanted to share with you here in this post.

There was a ton of practical info for everyone’s “To Do List” at the seminar…

… but there was also a very intriguing element of spirituality, too.

I wasn’t planning to go down that road.

However… Read more…

Are You Freakin' Kidding Me?

Tuesday, 9:18pm
Reno, NV
“He who refuses to embrace a unique opportunity loses the prize as surely as if he had failed.” (William James, the Godfather of modern psychology)

Okay, let me get this straight…

You are seriously going to ignore one of the most amazing opportunities of your life…

… because…

… well, I can’t even begin to fathom what your “because” reason might be.

I’m sure it makes some sort of sense to you… but it’s probably an illusion.

I understand the weird, twisted way humans look at opportunity… because I nearly allowed the Big One to get away from me.

Like most folks, I sorta resented opportunities.  They never appeared at convenient times, it was seldom clear what was involved, and there was always some change required if I wanted to pursue it.

I had learned — as most people do — that if I just looked the other way, that pesky opportunity would vanish…Read more…

Lessons From Amateur Drunk Night

Thursday, 11:30am
Reno, NV
“You’re young, you’re drunk, you’re in bed, you have knives… shit happens.” (Angelina Jolie)

Howdy…

Did you go out and do any damage on New Year’s Eve?

Hope you got home safe, if you did.

The world turns into Crazy Town every 12/31, and you can’t projectile-puke in any direction without hitting people who seldom (or should never) drink pounding down Jagermeister and double-bourbons like they’re channeling Hunter S. Thompson in his prime.

It’s been years since I’ve ventured away from home for New Year’s…

… and even then, I only went out because I was sitting in with a band in some bar or club.

There’s a small bit of safety being on a stage while the rookies party below. Even in the sleaziest biker bar I’ve ever had the pleasure of performing in… the bad-asses never assaulted the band.

They might bust a tweaker’s head against the bar just to see what the dude looked like sprawled on the floor…Read more…

Have A Good One…

Thursday, 11:42pm
Reno, NV
“You’ve got to be digging it while it’s happening, cuz it just might be a one-shot deal.”  (Frank Zappa)

Howdy…

Today, I want to say “Thanks” to all the wonderful people in my life.

And I hope you’re having a great holiday.

Sure, the airports are clogged with sneezing, coughing mobs enraged by delays and the prospect of being locked in a house with relatives they can’t stand for a week.

And yes, the politics of this country continue to crawl ever deeper down the rabbit hole leading to Bat-Shit Crazy Land.

And everywhere you look, greed and fear and suspicion lurk.

And yet… the world spins on, and if you can just let your mind settle for a few moments, the raw gorgeous beauty of everything can still take your breath away.

There’s a clever Chinese toast that carries both a curse and a blessing: “May you live in interesting times.”

As all wordsmiths know, that word “interesting” embraces both the good and the bad, the yin and the yang, of life.

Danger, excitement, and adventure.  The kind of events that will either kill you or make you stronger.Read more…

It's All Fun & Games Until…

Saturday, 2:48pm
Tampa, FL
“Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, know what I mean?” (Monty Python)

Howdy…

Special treat today on the blog.

Another guest post by our good friend, colleague and former stand-up comic (before his new career as killer copywriter), Kevin Rogers.

(Kevin is also the head writer for my Stable O’ Copywriters project, where you can find a recommended freelancer who meets my strict standards of professionalism — and who has my ear for consultations: www.carlton-copywriting.com.)

This cat is funny.  And every time Kevin and I hang out, I’m reminded of two things:

1. Nearly every top marketer and writer I know personally… has a shockingly-acute high-end sense of humor. (This explains the comraderie you see among the best in the biz.  We make each other laugh.)

2. And… there are awesomely valuable insights to life and success available in studying lessons in tales from the “vice squad”. (Meaning, that part of living well which includes hanging out, challenging the boundaries of sobriety, and squandering time laughing as hard as you can for as long as you can.)

Being funny won’t make you smarter.  And it doesn’t bestow an automatic deeper understanding of human behavior.

However… if you pay attention… Read more…

DIY vs. Mentoring

Thursday, 12:15pm
Reno, NV
“It’s too hard.  You’ll never figure it out.” (What the first copywriter I ever met told me about writing ads.)

Howdy…

I’m going to tell you about two promises here.

The stories behind them may help you chart out the rest of your life… as they did mine.

Harken:

Promise #1:

The above quote (“It’s too hard.  You’ll never figure it out.”) are the exact words that a professional copywriter said to me when I innocently asked for advice.

They are burned into my cerebral cortex, because it was one of the first times I had ever nurtured a small ember of actual hope about my future in business…

… and she crushed it like a bug.

All I’d wanted from her was a smidgen of advice. Maybe point me in the right direction.  Or offer a small word of encouragement.

I was lost at the time.  Trapped in the drudgery of a dead-end J.O.B. that sucked big-time.

And I was genuinely clueless about the process of writing anything for business.  I’d never met a real copywriter before, and was very interested in finding out more.

I didn’t even know what the word “mentor” meant at the time… but I suppose I would have squirmed with joy if she had said, instead, something like “Let me help you learn how to do this.”

Still, she did me a HUGE favor by being such a miserable, hateful bitch.

As I stood at her desk, burning with shame for having asked for something and been so brutally refused…

… I promised myself that I would prove her wrong.

And I used that promise as motivation whenever I needed some extra oomph in the next year or so, as I figured out — on my own, without help from anyone — how to write killer sales messages.

So I owe her one.  She did me a proper by igniting my until-then-dormant ability to Do It Myself.  Literally with a vengeance.

I launched my solo career as a freelance writer entirely on my own.  I took the Do It Yourself ethic and ran with it…Read more…

Life Lessons From Burning Man

Wednesday, 8:53pm
Reno, NV
“Make no mistake… this is an exercise in radical self-reliance…” (Burning Man survival guide)

Howdy…

No, I’m not at Burning Man this year.

Just couldn’t pull it off, because of random acts of viciousness and distraction ladled upon my poor vulnerable head by the universe.

Visited last year.  Might go next year, too.

I’ll see this Burn, though, through the sky-cam there in the smoldering Black Rock desert, if I see it at all.

However, just thinking about that amazingly unique event generated a familiar thought about survival.

I call it “The Hard Knocks Lesson Of Three’s“.

It applies to stuff like attending an event like Burning Man… which is a week-long freak show in the middle of the playa, way the hell in the middle of the northern Nevada desert.

Nothing you’ve ever done in your life, to this point, can totally prepare you for the experience.

One day before the event, the desert is a wasteland, free of humans.  One day into the event, it’s suddenly a Mad Max-styled city of 40,000 partiers who stay up all night torching stuff and dancing themselves into madness to blaring trance music (which goes 24 hours a day out there).

Lots of art, and street theater, and comraderie, and general naughtiness ensue, at levels you simply are not prepared for.

Experienced Burners report it’s a very raw, pure form of fun.  But daunting fun, at first.

You gotta bring every drop of your own water and food (or barter for it from others — no money is allowed inside Black Rock City)…

… and you’re on your own dealing with the sand storms, the brain-melting heat, the absolute lack of basic resources, and all the other details of maintaining good-animal health in the middle of Hell.

Trust me, it’s something that has to be seen to be believed.  People arrive from every corner of the globe, eager to get the party started again.

Burners take the self-reliance code to heart.  They truck in everything they need, and truck it back out again when the show’s over.  No trace is left of the massive city, or the party.

This once-a-year bacchanalia has been going on since the 1980s, with little or no mayhem or tragedy.

Self-reliant partiers.  It’s a concept.

The lesson, however, applies to all sorts of new experiences.  Like starting a new job.  Or putting together a market launch of a new product.  Or engaging in a new course or mentoring program.

Here’s what I’ve found:Read more…

The Secret To Real Success

Friday, 1:04pm
San Diego, CA
“First, learn your craft.  It won’t stop you from being a genius later.”

Howdy.

Quick little note today, to take you through the weekend (while I’m down here in Baja La-La Land speaking at the star-studded “Paid For Life” seminar).

If you — like me in my mis-spent youth, and like the vast majority of folks out there who “can’t get started” — feel a sense of satisfaction over your ability to Think Deep on Big Thoughts…

… you’d be doing yourself a favor by murdering that satisfaction right now.

The best quote I’ve ever seen on this was by biz legend Peter Drucker:

“Brilliant men are often strikingly ineffectual.  They fail to realize that the brilliant insight is not by itself achievement.  They never have learned that insights become effectiveness only through hard systematic work.”

In other words…

… you will never get shit done — no matter how smart you are (or think you are) — until you get MOVING on your ideas.

I, too, was a lost and wandering soul… until I discovered (by accident) the concept of goal-setting and — just as important — the trick to actually putting your goal-achievement plans into action.

That trick?Read more…

How To Lose Friends & Persuade People To Hate You

Tuesday, 8:54pm
Reno, NV
“You can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave…” (Eagles, “Hotel California”)

Howdy…

Today, let’s explore a little-discussed part of running a biz…

… using a couple of enlightening (and very brief) anecdotes from my recent (and continuing) “Adventures With Hotels”.

Let’s call this lesson: The Faded Lady and the Trump.

With all due apologies to Disney’s classic dog-romance movie, of course.

See if you can spot how the following short story applies to YOUR business…

Ahem.

Each of the last two weekends found me in different cities, staying in hotels I booked online, sight-unseen.

In Sin City, it was the splendiferous Trump International Hotel Las Vegas.

In San Francisco, the once-famous, now-infamous Cathedral Hill Hotel.

Now, the Trump joint was built with luxury in mind.  Shiny, tall, imposing building with huge well-apportioned rooms and super-modern equipment like elevators and art.

As a “product”, the building was great. (Though it seems idiotic not to have any gambling on the premises, as a wanna-be “player” in the Las Vegas scene.  I heard that Trump got skunked on getting his gambling license, but that’s not the spin the staff offered.  “We just didn’t want gambling here,” is what they said, unconvincingly.)

Great price for the rooms, too.  (Most likely because of the lack of casino amenities and dearth of unit sales, which turned it from condo to hotel.)

I have complaints about the joint… but not because of the room, the rate, or the basic delivery of stuff like air conditioning, clean water, nice beds, etc.  (In fact, their pillow-top beds are amazing to sleep in.  Like being cuddled by angels.)

Now, back in SF, it was a completely different situation.

We hosted a gathering of writers, affiliates, and other mucky-mucks at the Cathedral Hill Hotel because we wanted to treat everyone to an evening with the world-renown “Beer Chef“, who puts on fabulous dinners there once a month.  (You can read more about Bruce Paton’s unique meals at www.beer-chef.com. )

You want the “Beer Chef”, you deal with Cathedral Hill. (And yes, we very much wanted his magic.  He creates these shockingly-tasty gourmet meals there, with each course matched by a local micro-brew beer instead of boring old wine.  It’ll knock your socks off, even if you aren’t well-versed in pilsners, ales and lagers.)

We also started the day off with an afternoon-long brainstorm session in the hotel’s main meeting room.  (I’m sure you caught some of the updates on Twitter from the luminaries and stars in attendance.)

However…

… none of us had ever stayed at the hotel.

And while it has a storied past (well-chronicled in San Francisco lore), it has, alas,  fallen on hard times.

Culminating in being bought out a short time ago and scheduled for the wrecking ball.

Ouch.

We made the most of it.  The stories and jokes we all shared about our rooms and experiences in the hotel are howlingly funny…

… but still, as a “product”, there’s no getting around the fact that the building was in serious disrepair.

Sort of like a once-beautiful lady who has fallen on hard times, and ended up sacked-out in a filthy alley, soused with cheap booze and a reputation heading south at light speed.

The price was actually a red flag: You cannot stay in the city, in a decent room, for anywhere near the rate Cathedral Hill was asking.

Kind of like seeing an ad for a luxury Caribbean Cruise in the paper for five bucks.  It sort of sets off your early-warning alarm.  (Five bucks and your kidney, maybe.)

So… while no one got robbed, or found a dead hooker in their room… Read more…

Avoid The Void

Monday, 11am
Reno, NV
“Facts are stupid things.” (Ronald Reagan, ’88 GOP convention)

Howdy…

Well, that was fun.

Over 650 comments on that last quiz so far (with a bullet).  Some really good responses, too.

Also some really out-there ones, which always makes for giddy reading.

The main thing, of course, is that so many folks put on their Thinking Caps and went for it.  As I’ve said before: You win just by trying with this kind of brain stumper.

Anyway…

… we have a winner.  I’ll let you know who it was in a minute.

First, let’s relieve the tension and reveal the answer already.

Or at least head in that direction.  It’s probably worth noting that only a tiny handful of the comments were on the right path.

The question was vague, on purpose.  This is high-end street-level psychology…

… and one of the main features of this kind of advanced salesmanship is that it is NOT easily understood by most people.

In fact, you’ve likely encountered the answer to this quiz before in your life… but because it didn’t “fit” with your intuition and belief about “how things work”, it didn’t stick.

Most of what classic salesmen know about people runs counter to what the majority calls  “common sense”.

This is startling to rookie marketers.  Confusing.  Disorienting.  Challenges long-held beliefs about the nobility of human endeavor and the lofty inclinations of the human brain.

Thus, we saw long sub-threads in the comments that ignored the entire concept of a “glitch” in people’s thinking…

… and instead dove into all kinds of elaborate explanations of how a successful sales pitch might smoothly proceed with dignity and logic.

It’s good to have these discussions, if you desire to get anywhere in marketing.

I, too, had trouble getting into the minds of my prospects at first.

This is why I jumped on every opportunity that arose, early in my career, to hang out and grill every “street wise” marketer I ran into.

Cuz those guys knew how to SELL.

No theory.  Just experience (and the bank accounts to prove it).

This group included:

… Jay Abraham and Gary Halbert (both of whom had door-to-door selling experience where, if they didn’t make the sale, they didn’t eat that day)…Read more…